It's in the Bible

After checking into the hotel, Father Willy O’Dilly finds a Bible on the bed-side table. He reads it for a couple of hours and then leaves his room and wanders into the lobby. There he strikes up a conversation with the pretty young receptionist. After she finishes work, they share a few drinks in the bar and then retire to Father O’Dilly’s room, but when the priest starts to remove her clothes, she starts to have second thoughts. " Are you sure this is alright?" she asks. " I mean you are a priest "
" Don’t worry my dear, " he replies, " it’s written in the Bible. "
She believes him and the two of them spend a pleasant night together. But in the morning, as the girl is getting ready to leave, she says, " You know Father, I don’t remember that part in the Bible you mentioned last night, could you show it to me?"
So the priest takes the Bible from the bed-side table, opens the cover and points to the bottom of the title page, where someone has written in pencil, " The girl in the reception is a good root. "


Three nuns die in a car accident, and ascend to the Pearly Gates.

St. Peter checks his big book and says “Sisters, you should be fine to enter heaven but you just need to answer a Biblical question first”

He turns to the first nun and asks “Sister, can you tell me the names of the first man and woman?”

“Oh, that’s easy! Adam and Eve!”

He waves her through and asks the second nun “And where did Adam & Eve live?”

“Simple - the Garden of Eden!”

She also enters Heaven so St Peter asks the third question “After God created Eve from Adam’s rib, what was the first thing she said to Adam?”

“Ooooh, that’s a very hard one!”

“Well done sister, you can join your friends”

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Look up “rib” in the dictionary and it says “To vex, irritate or annoy.”
Look up “rib” in the Bible and it says “Woman.”


Why was Noah the best businessman in the Bible?

He floated his stock while everybody else was being liquidated.

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Two nuns in a bath. The first one says “Where’s the soap”; the second one
replies “Yes it does, doesn’t it”

Two nuns cycling down a cobbled street. The first one says “I’ve never come
this way before”; the second one replies “Must be the cobbles”

Mother Superior: “Sister Maria, if you walk through town at night, and you’re accosted by a man with bad intentions, what would you do?”
Sister Maria: “I would lift my habit, mother Superior.”
Mother Superior (shocked): “And what would you do next?”
Sister Maria: “I would tell him to drop his pants.”
Mother Superior: (even more shocked) “And what then?”
Sister Maria: “I would run away. I can run much faster with my habit up than he with his pants down.”


Good story King, but I don’t think O’Dilly is a real Irish name.


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Didnt realise it was the off season already.